The Free-Ride offspring have been considering careers. This past week, they both got excited about the prospect of becoming veterinarians.
Elder offspring: I think I might want to be a veterinarian when I grow up.
Dr. Free-Ride: You could do that. You like science, you like animals, you like solving puzzles. I think you might be really good at it.
Younger offspring: I could be a veterinarian, too! I really like dogs and cats and rodents and birds.
Elder offspring: I think I might want to be a veterinarian at a zoo … but maybe not for the zebras. I heard that they can kick and bite, and really hurt the zoo keepers, and then I might need a doctor myself.
Dr. Free-Ride: I suspect that if you needed to give a zebra care, you’d be able to give it a medicine to calm down, or anesthesia so it wouldn’t be awake if you had to do surgery or something major.
Younger offspring: Anesthesia like when Curious George swallowed the puzzle piece and had to go to the hospital?
Elder offspring: Was that called ether?
Dr. Free-Ride: The stuff in the bottle he got into that made him pass out? Yes. I’m not sure ether is a widely used veterinary anesthetic any more.
Younger offspring: Because monkeys get into it?
Dr. Free-Ride: I suspect the problem is that it is extremely flammable, and can explode.
Elder offspring: That wouldn’t calm a zebra down.
Younger offspring: I’d want to make all the animals that came to me not be sick or hurt.
Elder offspring: Me, too.
Dr. Free-Ride: That’s what vets try to do. But animals are kind of like humans — they don’t live for ever, and sometimes their bodies get old and worn out enough that just living hurts.
Younger offspring: Can vets fix that?
Elder offspring: (quietly) Sometimes vets put those animals to sleep.
Dr. Free-Ride: That’s a euphemism. They aren’t really sleeping. But the vet gives them a medicine that eases their pain and lets them die quickly.
Younger offspring: That sounds really sad.
Elder offspring: An animal who’s suffering all the time with nothing else you can do for them would be sadder.
Dr. Free-Ride: Being a vet wouldn’t be a happy job all the time, but helping the animals would be really important.
Younger offspring: But not with ether, ’cause it can explode.
Dr. Free-Ride: It’s nice that you remember that fact, but I worry that someone will get the wrong idea about why you know that.
Younger offspring: I’ve never exploded ether!
Elder offspring: Yet.
* * * * *
Younger offspring offers a rebus to help identify the veterinary patient in this drawing. When animals are not box-shaped, geometrical perspective is more challenging.
Two panels to provide a taste of Elder offspring’s bedside manner:
I really like your kids; at least the blogged version thereof. Tell ’em they’d better study…it’s a lot harder to get into vet school than med school.
Hmm, I don’t know…
“Z” + “n. A woman’s undergarment worn to support and give contour to the breasts” = ??
ROFL!
Some things your offspring might want to consider re: the veterinary field, in no particular order: 1) Liking animals alone is not a good reason for being a veterinarian. In fact, vet school interviewing committees hate to hear “I have always loved animals!” given as the sole or even primary reason for wanting to go to vet school; 2) Being a vet of the typical sort means you’ll be dealing with people as much as you deal with animals. My friend who wanted to be a vet since she was 7 yrs old has found the profession rather disappointing. She likes the animals well enough, but she hates having to deal with the human owners, many of whom are rude to her and accuse her of ordering tests on their beloved Fifi just so she can “pay off her Mercedes”. Being a vet is a lot of work and requires dealing with not only recalcitrant and even hostile animals, but recalcitrant and hostile people as well. I don’t think I could do it, as I don’t have the requisite patience; 3) Secondly, vets are the lowest paid and least respected of all practioners in the health-related areas, even though they have some of the hardest schooling to get through. It’s a lot of work for not much compensation; my friend who is a stay-at-home mom married to a vet is reluctant to have more than two kids, even though she’d love more, just because her hub’s salary can’t support a larger family…and he still has a lot of debt from his vet schooling, even though he went in-state; 4) Right now vet school student populations (and applicants) are overwhelmingly female, and will continue to be so for the forseeable future. I don’t know the sex of your kids, but male applicants definitely have an advantage in vet school admissions. Female applicants, on the other hand, face fiercer competition, especially if they don’t live in a state that has its own vet school.
Personally, if your kids are really into the science/reserach aspect, I’d encourage them to try for the DVM/PhD route. That way they get to go to school tuition-free, even though it’s a longer haul, and they would be well-suited to keep on doing the interesting, more science-y research stuff once they graduate (without debt!).
Euthanizing a pet can be necessary but very, very sad. my daughter says that the saddest day in her life was the day we euthanized her first dog. Meg had been an abused dog adopted from a shelter, and she never did completely recover from the ill-treatment she received before being rescued. She would bite when startled, and finally one day she bit my daughter on the face and sent her to the emergency room. After that, we knew we couldn’t keep Meg any longer. The folks at the shelter had told us that if for any reason we couldn’t keep Meg, we should contact them. When I did, they said we could bring Meg back but that given Meg’s history of biting, they couldn’t offer her to another family and would in fact have to euthanize her for the safety of their staff. I weighed dropping her off and allowing my daughter to think that Meg would find a new home, but that would have meant that I would have to lie to my daughter every time she said “I wonder where Meg is now.” So I told my daughter, and she insisted that we instead take Meg to our veterinarian so that she could be with Meg when she died. For a child, that is the definition of courage because if ever the phrase ‘it broke her heart’ meant something, it was that day.
Unfortunately the one of the greatest needs for vets is with the USDA to inspect animals at slaughter houses. Currently there are over 2000 unfilled positions like this. But most people interested in being vets want to save animals and not help them be eaten.
They should think about ichthyology. That was the only profession for me when I was that age. I’m not sure of the amount of ether used in that field however.
Do Americans usually say “veterinarian”? Nobody in the UK says that, we just say “vet”.
Donalbain,
We say vet too over here. But little kids do have a habit of using the full word. All part of not having a fully developed brain yet.
BTW, Elder Sprog appears to be developing a distinctive style. Looks like her hand-eye coordination is coming along nicely, which means her stretch receptors* are starting to come online. The wee lassie is growing up.
*A set of nerves which serve to inform a person of body movement. When the stretch receptors are in action a child can, after familiarization, walk backwards on a narrow beam with his eyes closed, and not miss a step. I know this because that’s what a senior from San Diego State College had me do when I was nine.
I’m sorry, but now I have a picture of hordes of rampaging ether-addicted monkeys ransacking the anesthesia cabinets.
And I think that this is the first time I’ve seen real ennui in a grade-schooler’s drawing (the vet in the first picture).
I love sprog blogging!
Welcome to my world. (Please send margaritas.)
You don’t lie nearly enough to your kids. All this death and pain and euthanasia. Just tell ’em the pets go the big dog run in the sky where they play with other pets and eat nice treats and stuff.
I never used to read your sprog-blogging…now I’m an addict. And my little one like the pictures.
A sprog would struggle to say veterinarian in the UK, since it is a word that is hardly ever said. I think I was about 8 or 9 when I realised that “vet” was an abbreviation for anything.
It’s amazing some kids already know what they want to do when they grow up. I remember I didn’t have a clue until I was in university!
But yeah, being a veterinarian is good 😀 At least here in Malaysia where their services are severely lacking